matt-groff.com

For those of us around the world fortunate enough to have electricity, internet, cable and clean running water, we take these things for granted. Haiti is not so lucky. Most Haitians survive on only two American dollars per day. The glass of milk and the toast with peanut butter I just ate cost me more than that. Haiti is a country in such poverty that they still rely on foreign aid for the majority of their food which is needed to survive.

And now an earthquake with a magnitude of 7.0 hits this Caribbean nation. Whether you believe the people of Haiti should just leave, or that they struck some deal with devil to escape the French, how can your heart not go out to these people? Some may not be able to afford to leave. We are not able to pick where we are born, and who our parents are, we should not punish these people for also not having that luxury.

You can help, but texting “Haiti” to 90999, $10 will be taken out of your phone bill and donated to the red cross in order to help the relief efforts in Haiti.

As for those right wing religious nuts who claim that Haiti made a deal with the devil to escape the French, what the hell is wrong with you? How can you justify the disasters which have hit this country because of an alleged deal with the devil? Did you know that at least 75% of the population of Haiti is Catholic? How about that deal with the devil now? What percentage of the population of Haiti that is alive now was around when this deal was struck? Five percent maybe? I’m not even sure, this is just a quick post to really bring to light the absurdity of these comments.

Oh and Rush Limbaugh shut your friggen trap. Obama is going to look like a savior for sending aid to Haiti? Really? So Bush didn’t look good just because he sent troops to the Middle East after 9/11. Maybe you think that tragedy happened at the perfect time for Bush. How can you listen to that filth, pandering to the idiots of the right. Now Obama will look good with the light skin and dark skin blacks. You racist piece of crap. Really? Even if that is a play on Senator Reid’s comments, how dare you?

The Haiti relief efforts are only going to be hindered by the idiotic comments of right wing nut bags who fear the bible over the truth. I have no problem with religion and I have no problem with good old fashion politics, but bringing race and religion into the reasons for disaster and the compassion for which follows it? How do you sleep at night?

I hope some day you are faced with a personal disaster, and that no one helps you because of the color of your skin, the side of the aisle you sit upon and the incorrigible rhetoric which you so blindly preach.

This is not your typical happy holiday’s blog post. I do wish everyone happy holidays, just this means I’m cleaning out the notes on my iPhone with stuff that irks me. So enjoy the food, parties, people and the gifts, cause here is what is getting at me.

You ever see that Windows phone commercial? The one where the guy is in the meeting relaxing in his chair and Excel Icon is dancing outside the meeting room door waiting to get in. This commercial disturbs me. Why must you hide your icons under the table? Are they under there servicing you? I don’t think its a good idea to have tights adorn figures playing finger games under your desk, especially with you squirming all over the place like you are being satisfied.

There is a WebMD commercial that has all these people saying, “I looked up such and such, and webMD helped me out.” That’s great, I’m glad you figured out you have crabs, now you should probably see a real doctor in order to get a cream for that. A website can’t write you a prescription for your gout either. The commercial goes on to say, “I trust webMD because my doctor trusts webMD.” Really? Your doctor trusts webMD? If I was at my doctor and I saw that bastard peeking at the webMD site to diagnose my condition, I’d fight him first, then I’d get the hell out of there. If you are going to a place where your doctor trusts webMD, you are probably in Mexico, that or a free clinic in Chinatown. You shouldn’t be going to those sort of places for band aids let alone actual medical advice.

I never understood the idea behind a family four pack of anything. Aren’t you limiting your audience if you say, “Family Four Pack?” What if I don’t have a family? Can I still go? Isn’t that discrimination? I’m sorry you can’t/don’t have children, you can’t attend this event. I think we should do away with anything related to family four packs, unless it is Sesame Place, that’s ok then.

I shopped on black Friday, here are a few observations:

1. If someone is carrying a lot of bags and you aren’t carrying a lot, maybe you should move out of their way as a matter of societal expectations instead of making them shift their entire load out-of-the-way. Seems like that might work better.

2. If you start laughing and then coughing because you smoke too much, that might be a sign you need to quit smoking. Laughing at a joke should not be painful and should not make you cough up blood.

3. No I won’t save your spot in line while you smoke a cigarette, idiot.

4. Just because you and your friend are Puerto Rican and appear to be the only two spanish oriented people in the line, does not mean that you can yell at each other in spanish just because no one will understand. I speak a little bit of spanish, and no you couldn’t get me.

5. Black Friday = Lines. Deal with it or stay at home.

Why would you EVER use panelling in a home? I don’t understand the whole “wood” look in a room. If you are using panelling, we can tell it is not real wood if you didn’t spend the money. And why build a log cabin? Who are you Davey Crockett? It’s apparent that technology has advanced well beyond the log cabin design. I know you may be nostalgic for killing your dinner and sleeping on a burlap sack, but you might want to reconsider.

It’s no secret, I’m a dog lover. I’ve had dogs my entire life that I can remember. There may have been a year hiatus between when Crackers was put to sleep and when Kirby was adopted. Dogs sometimes just know things, speaking of which PJ dog must know I’m starting to write about her as she just placed her paw on my leg and is staring at me with her big brown eyes.

This picture was taken a day ago when I was getting ready for work. The unwavering affection in her eyes, without even a whimper or a bark she lets me know, “I love you, thank you for saving me, thank you for rescuing me.”

I didn’t rescue PJ for the gratitude, I didn’t buy her because I felt I was doing something good and I wanted the credit for it. I rescued PJ because I’ve had dogs, I’ve seen that affection, that loyalty, that love. I wanted a dog as a companion and I got way more than that.

PJ is quite possibly the most affectionate dog in the world. When I leave my house in the morning, she sits there and stares at me, she turns her head to the side and her big brown eyes glisten as if she’s about to tear up. It takes everything I have to walk out that door.

As pathetic as it sounds, I leave music on when I’m gone to entertain her. I won’t leave the house without telling her I love her. If I’m going somewhere and it’s going to be dark before I return, I leave the dining room light on so she doesn’t have to sit in the dark by herself.

I don’t even have close to a real job. I can work from home most of my day. But for those four to five hours of the day I’m gone, if I’m gone more than that, I have someone walk her or pick her up. She could easily make it the entire day, but I just hate the feeling of her being alone.

I recently bought a house in Marietta. My first home, I’ve lived in a apartments and with my parents. People ask if I live alone, I tell them no. They ask who is my roomate, I tell them I don’t have a roommate, I live with my dog PJ. Most people just laugh, they don’t understand. But the dog lovers know, I truly don’t live alone.

Dogs are such a loyal animal, so loving and caring, they become part of your life just like a child. Some nights when I go to bed, I’ll tell PJ it’s bed time. I’ll go upstairs get ready to go to sleep, brush my teeth, set my alarm and the TV sleep timer. Most nights, PJ is waiting there at the end of the bed on her little pillow(yes she has her own pillow) and all is right with the world. I hop into the bed, tell pj good night and I fall asleep probably within 15 minutes.

But there are some nights, when PJ just decides, “I’m not going to bed right now, I feel like playing with my toys a little longer.” Those nights, I get ready for bed just the same way, I set my alarm, set the sleep timer, hop into bed… then I toss and turn, I can’t sleep. The sleep timer expires and I have to turn the tv back on.

There is a travelers insurance commercial where the dog has his favorite bone, he hides it a few places, he buries it, he puts it in a safe deposit box and he dreams about it. Finally he gets it insured by travelers and all is right with the world, see below.

So I’m watching that commercial and I’m thinking, “wow that’s a cute commercial.” As I look down, PJ is sitting there next to me with the same exact bone in her mouth, as if to say, “Can we get insurance on this?”

Dogs know, they know when you’re sad, or angry. I’ll yell at my laptop and pj will crawl over, put a paw on my leg and look up at me. Telling me, “Whatever is making you mad, I’ll listen to you.” I’ll sit there and talk right at her, and even though she has no idea what I’m saying, she tilts her head to look interested, then she’ll give me a few quick doggy kisses and everything will be ok. Today I went to visit my parents, they live only a mile away. The majority of the time I go there, I’ll take PJ with me and she will play with Kirby(16 years on Saturday the 31st and still kicking.) I didn’t take her today because it was just a quick trip and she HATES the car.

I get to my parents I’m cleaning up a small grill that I’m taking to a pearl jam concert tomorrow. I walk inside a few times, and back into the garage. I hear Kirby inside whining. My mom is inside, so she’s with him, he’s not alone, he sees me coming in and out and he’s whining. He’s expecting PJ to be with me. He misses his friend and wants to play with her. We promise Kirby she’ll be here tomorrow, so they can play. He opens his mouth, hangs his tongue out as if to smile and pants a little bit. You can tell he’s thinking, “But I wanna play now!”

The other week, I tortured myself by watching Marley & Me. Let me just say, I bawled like a baby. From the first time Marley had trouble walking up the steps until he was put down, my eyes were welled up with tears. I’d look at PJ and think, “I know you’re only five, but I have no idea how I’m going to take  it when this happens to us.” I love this dog. Pj watched the whole movie with me and we cuddled a bit afterwards.

How you could ever hurt one of this animals is way beyond me. That undying affection, the loyalty. No matter what kind of day I had, PJ is always waiting at the door to give me doggy kisses and I can’t wait for her to give them to me.

I love my dog.

In March 2002 the Minnesota Twins were one of two teams that were picked to be contracted, eliminated from Major League Baseball. Since then Minnesota has won 5 out of 7 division titles, had 2 Cy Young award winners, 1 MVP, 3 Batting Titles, and another possible MVP this year. They’ve had 4 consecutive seasons of 2 million + in attendance including 2.3 million this year. In 2010 they open brand new Target Field.

Almost eliminated from baseball, almost left for dead, players scattered among other teams, stadium abandoned… A city with one of the richest traditions in baseball history almost had their hearts ripped out by the greedy owners of baseball. Don’t forget 1987, they weren’t the favorites. In 1991 they went from worst to first to stun the Braves with 2 straight extra inning games to steal the title in possibly the greatest world series EVER.

Down 7 games on September 6th, the twins made an improbabe run of 16-4 to tie the division. With 4 games left the twins were 3 games behind the tigers, yet fought to force a tie breaker and game 163. Down 3-0 in the 3rd did the Twins give up? No. First and third with no outs in the top of the 9th did they give up? No. Down 5-4 in the 10th did the twins give up? No… They fought, they scraped, and Alexi Casilla who hits below the mendoza line hit a bloop single scoring Carlos Gomez in the bottom of the 12th to advance.

The Yankees may be the overwhelming favorites, and they deserve to be. They might have 103 wins and be 7-0 against Minnesota this season. But a billion dollars in contracts and an allstar at every position doesn’t mean you win every game.

That doesn’t sound like a team afraid of anything, contraction, seemingly insurmountable leads, players leaving for more money in larger markets, or 103 win fantasy teams. Go ahead and count them out, it’s what they want and they just might surprise you.

Go Twins!

This post might be a little premature, but it’s been something that’s been resonating in my brain for quite some time. A dog’s life is something that’s quite like the elderly grand parent who’s accepted their better years are behind them and any day could be their last.

Everyone around them senses this feeling and feeds off of it, almost accepting the fact that life as they know it has come to an end, or will eventually. And when that day comes, we cry, we laugh, we gather around and celebrate their lives. Even with the overwhelming acceptance we’ve held for the previous days, months, years; it still hurts.

I’ve had three dogs in my life. The first was crackers, a stray my parents picked up around the time I was born. She was a collie and German Sheppard mixed, all white with a brown spot on her left hind leg and a pink nose. She was the sweetest dog; greeted you when you entered a room, slept at the end of the bed, didn’t have to go out too much, never really begged for food. As a child I was more concerned about friends, school, sports, etc, to really pay attention to the dog. She wasn’t mine per say, either. I loved crackers just the same, when she passed it was only a few weeks before my 13th birthday. We cried, she was cremated and now sits on top of my parents hutch.

We rescued Kirby from the Humane league in 1994. He was a 1o month old lab and border collie mixed. I remember when we picked him out, my mom put her fingers in his cage and he licked them, we knew he was the one. For those of you who know anything about border collies, they are extremely smart dogs, probably the smartest breed out there, they are also very hyper and very active. They love to run, they love to play. We did not know this.

The first night we had Kirby we didn’t have a crate, we had two baby gates stacked up on top of each other and kept him in a hall way, that was until he figured out how to jump over them. After purchasing a crate we thought the problem was solved until he was trained, but he figured out how to get out of that. It had three latches that slid behind bars, and another little turn key that wrapped around the bar and held it in place. Whether kirby was let out by someone or bashed his head against the crate until he escaped, we had no idea. Finally, a padlock was used. This was until the babysitter left it off, kirby escaped and decided to chew stuff meaningful to us. He chewed Kyle’s favorite Falcons hat and my sisters favorite barbie.

He knew what he was doing, he was no dummy. But we forgot about him trying to run, that was until he took off a couple times. He’d be laying in the middle of the living room, we’d open up the front door and before we could say hello, boom he was gone across the street and into the fields behind our development. We lived around a lot of farm land so as soon as he got off of our block it was all open space. Kirby was so fast, he’d get so far ahead of us that even if we ran full speed after him, he’d have time to squat and take a dump and we still wouldn’t catch him.

All he wanted to do was run, and after he got done and you were done chasing him or a neighboring farmer would catch him, he’d smile at you, tongue hanging out and walk home next to you. It was like, “ok guys that was fun, let’s go home.” He’d sometimes let you catch up to him, then as you stood face to face, he’d do this move where he’d duck his front shoulder down as if he was going to take off that way and then as soon as you froze or moved that direction, he would break your ankles and take off the other way.

I remember one time we chased him in a foot of snow, he was just this little black dot hundreds of feet ahead of us, the only reason we caught him was when he got caught in a snow drift.

My brother use to run football plays  in the back yard with the dog. Kirby would stand 4 feet behind him, my brother would yell  “hike” then all of a sudden kirby would run to the left or right and grab the nerf football. Hed take off to the end of the yard, stop, turn around and trot back. It was as if he knew it was football practice.

As kirby grew older, his back hips got bad. He started having trouble climbing the steps, or getting up on the couch to sleep. When my brother would leave, he’d cry and howl and whine. He’d take 2 minutes to walk up a flight of steps, but if you opened that back door he took two steps jumped off the first level of the deck to the second level, one bounce and was in the yard. You’d approach him and he’d still duck his shoulder, and run the other way.

Now, he sleeps all day, when he gets up he has trouble walking. It’s like he sleeps all day to avoid walking up and down the steps, but when he does get up, he can barely walk. He runs in the yard, his back legs move together as if they are one, he barks at whomever is out there and bumps into your legs cause he’s blind and has no idea you are actually there.

Kirby’s best days are when PJ is there. PJ is my 5-year-old lab mix, a ball full of energy and the sweetest dog you’ll meet. She’s the kind of dog that if someone broke in the house, she’d lick them and show them where all my cool stuff is. When PJ is there, Kirby runs, he jumps off the deck, he plays with PJ. We keep pj on a chain still, kirby knows exactly how long that chain is. He’ll sit there and bark at her as she runs towards him only to have the chain keep her away. Then he’ll trot around a little in front of her just to tease.

Kirby is now 15, he’ll be 16 at the end of November. It pains me to think that he might not make it through the end of the year. Dog’s are incredibly loyal, no matter what day I’ve had or what mood I’m in, Pj is waiting for me when I get  home. Her tail is wagging, her tongue is out, and she wants to jump up and give me a hug. She can’t wait to see me, she can’t wait for me to sit down at my laptop so she can sit next to me and stare at me as I work. Sometimes I eat lunch at my parents house, if kirby realizes I’m there he will come down sit on the couch next to me as I eat my lunch. As soon as I’m done and I clean my plate, he heads back up stairs. It’s as if he comes down to keep me company while I eat.

Whenever I’m home, PJ wants to spend all her time with me. She’ll grab a ball, bring it over to me and drop it next to my leg. Or she’ll get another toy and put it on the couch next to me so she can be right there while I work. At times I feel like I’m being watched, and I look over to see PJ’s big brown eyes starring at me. In the morning, when I get up, she doesn’t wait more than a minute to move into my spot in bed as if to keep it warm for me. Thinking, maybe he’ll come back and snuggle a little longer.

Dog’s are loyal, dogs are loving. They’ll forgive you when you’re mean, they’ll love you just for feeding them some bland food. They keep your bed warm, and there is never a shortage of doggy kisses.

Kirby is still alive, for how long I don’t know. I wish forever, it’s almost not fair that dog’s lives are so much shorter than humans. How is this animal who’s so loyal, so trusting, so trustworthy punished with such a short life.

For dogs, the pain isn’t as visible. Humans cry, complain, scream and talk about how much it hurts. A dog will limp a little bit, not be as energetic or just sleep all day. Sometimes it is nice, just because they aren’t bugging to go out all the time. But when I think about it, I’m going to miss him bugging me to go out, I’m going to miss his little duck and jive move, his dog hair everywhere. I’m going to miss his bark, and when he nudges your leg because you are paying too much attention to the TV instead of him.

And when I think about it, the more I hate myself for being a dog lover. Why get so attached to an animal that is unknowingly going to break your heart in a matter of years. It’s like any year after 10 is borrowed time almost.

When PJ turns 15 I’ll be 39. Hopefully old enough to understand more about death, pain, and more mature to handle the sadness. But right now, as kirby celebrates his 16th birthday, I’m not nearly able to handle it. This weekend I’m heading out-of-town and I’m dropping off PJ at my parents for the weekend. I think before I leave I’ll let them out to go for a run, so I can hear his bark, see his move, watch him play and leap off the deck. I don’t know when I’m going to be able to see it again, for the last time.

When Kirby actually does pass, I’ll write some more about  him… I hope I don’t have to do that for a while.

AT&T has failed me even more this time. After releasing the below link, and not doing so with much fanfare, AT&T decided to be vague about it. http://www.att.com/gen/press-room?pid=1574

I called AT&T a number of times asking for clarity and each time the customer service representative had no clue what I was talking about. Each time they had to call me back and then never did.

Finally this morning I got a rep. willing to talk to me. She read the memo, asked her boss came back to the phone and said, Mr. Groff, you are eligible for the $199 iPhone upgrade on the 3Gs.

I jumped for joy, I said thank you so much. Will you please make a clear notation on my account, or can I buy the phone now from you. She said, you have to go into the store but I will make the note on your account.

The above link states that, if you purchased an iPhone 3G in July, August or September of 2008, you are considered an early adopter. If you are an early adopter and your AT&T service bill is $99 or more a month, you are eligible for an early upgrade. Instead of waiting the 18 months (for those who don’t pay $99 or more) or the 12 months for those who bought in July and spend $99 a month, you can upgrade today for the full discount and not the $399/$499 early upgrade “discount” aka AT&T bending me over and ramming me without lube.

So being that I spoke to AT&T this morning, confirming I’m an early adopter(check) and that my bill is over $99 a month($107 check) I can get the 16 GB iPhone 3Gs for $199… right? Uh, not so fast.

I went to the AT&T store as I was told, skipped to the counter and found a nice girl named Krystal to sell me my 3Gs. First I asked, “do you have any left?” “I dunno”, she says, “let me check.”

Krystal returns shortly, “We have one left,  I hid it for you.” I say, “Wonderful, let me tell you my story.” I go into the above dissertation about calling AT&T, confirming with them, and asking for her to check my account. She logs on her computer and says, “Sorry, you have to pay $399.” I say, “But look, as I told you there is a note on the account, please go here,” and I read off the web address above. She reads it over, prints it out, takes it to her manager.

A minute later, Krystal returns,she has to take it to another manager. He walks over, looks at the stuff, says, “Our system is already updated with this info, you pay what it says.” I look at him and say, “well did you see the note.” “Yeah he says, it’s vague.”

I’m befuddled, this should have been taken care of. So I say to him, “Do I fit all the criteria or not?” He looks at my account, “Yes.” I look even more confused, “Then what is the problem?” He looks at my account again, looks at the print out and says, “Let me make some calls.”

Fifteen minutes go by and he comes back, “You have to pay the $399, the reason is your account is $92.57 before taxes, it doesn’t get over $99 until you add taxes etc.” I’m pissed now, “So where does it say in the flyer that it’s before tax?” He looks the flyer over, “It doesn’t, it’s just common sense.”

I’m furious now, apparently I lack common sense to know that AT&T’s $99 is different from my $99 considering I pay fucking taxes on their services. Truth be told, I couldn’t even decipher my AT&T bill to know that my bill is $92.57 before taxes. So at this point I say, “There is nothing you can do? I’m either buying that iPhone for $199 or I’m not buying anything from you…” The guy looks at me and says “sorry.”

So on my way home I call and verify that it is before taxes and that the lady this morning screwed up. I still think AT&T needs to be clearer with it’s policies. I also believe that AT&T should have a referral program.

I’ve sold at least 15-20 iPhone 3G phones to clients of mine, including 2 year service contracts, texting plans, data plans. I’ve personally made AT&T thousands and thousands of dollars. If they were to look at my account and see the list of referrals, I’m sure they’d have no problem selling me an iPhone for $199… that is if they didn’t give me one for free.

The CEO, CFO, President, and board members of AT&T should be in jail. I can understand that AT&T is in this business to make money, and I can understand that they want to keep people from upgrading their device everytime a new one comes up. But we must remember that AT&T is getting a 2 year contract for every phone they sell. There is no way that they are not making a boat load of cash.

Robbery is the crime, and hard time should be paid. The iPhone, in all inclinations, is a different type of device. For different types of devices, different rules should apply. There is no other cell phone out there that sells 500,000 devices in a weekend. There is no other cell phone out there that requires the waiting in line of 6 hours starting at 4am. No other cell phone has apple and AT&T stores opening up 2 hours before normal time.

This is why the 18 month grace period for upgrading a cell phone should not apply towards the iPhone. It’s not exactly a normal phone. And we must remember that even if we get a new iPhone every 12 months, AT&T isn’t losing out on money, because our old cell phones will be sold to other people and thus more AT&T Subscribers. And if for some reason Apple doesn’t upgrade every year, then we’d gladly keep our 3G for 2 years, blame apple not the consumer.

AT&T is already holding millions of iPhone users hostage with it’s more dropped calls, 3G deadzones,  and all around cell phone access dead zones. I just bought a home near the susquehanna river, this area is covered by 3G and has been for over a year. Just across the river I can see the cell phone tower, however I have zero signal on my phone the majority of times. This is not just in my house, but outside my house, up the street, down the street, standing on my roof. Did AT&T forget the lovely borough of Marietta? It sure seems like it.

But that’s a little off base. With every new iPhone purchse AT&T is getting 24 months of service. The cheapest service plan for AT&T is $39.99. Over a 24 month period, that is $959.76. There have been over 40 million iPhones sold, between the first model and the 3G model. The Edge model had a $20 a month data fee, and the 3G has a $30 a month data fee. If we split those in half and get $25 an multiply that by th 24 we get, $600. So $959.76 + $600 = $1559.76 on average of iPhone subscriptions. This doesn’t take into account the $20 a month most of us pay for unlimited text, or that some of us may have more than the minimum amount of minutes given in the $39.99 base plan.

$1559.76 per user, and 40 million phone sold. Let’s assume that 35 million of them are still on AT&T and still active. 35 million times $1559.76 is $54,591,600,000.00. That’s correct, over $54.5 billion dollars will be brought into AT&T just from the iphone alone. That doesn’t take into account the texting, the phones that AT&T has that aren’t iphones, and the cost of the phone.

Fifty four point five billion dollars and AT&T has to jack up the price of iPhone for people who bought the 3G the day it came out last year, so that we cannot get the newest iPhone for a discounted price. You greedy fucking bastards. What is wrong with you? The iPhone is a different sort of device, I shelled out $400 for my first one, and $300 for my second one. I shouldn’t have to shell out $400 for my third one because you want to pad your money lined pockets a little more.

This, not to mention is all on top of the fact that current 3G owners and 3Gs owners will not have tethering and MMS right away. AT&T is predicting that MMS will be out at the end of summer. And I did a little research, it may be sooner than that. On the AT&T site you can change your text messaging unlimited plan for the iPhone to the Messaging unlimited plan for the iPhone. It won’t actually make a difference on your phone you still can’t send MMS but it’s there which means that it’s coming soon. But I’m still pissed. AT&T says it wants to be able to bring MMS to customers in the best way possible. Oh? So when Apple said that it’s 3.0 software would feature MMS that wasn’t enough time to devise a plan to bilk your customers out of more money to stuff your mattresses with? And we all know that Apple cleared with AT&T that it would be doing the MMS here soon. No way were they caught off guard, Apple wouldn’t go behind the backs of it’s largest provider and sneak this MMS feature in would it? 

Tethering will never happen with AT&T, simply put AT&T already has 3G devices out there that provide internet connections for laptops. They wouldn’t ever let you piggy back a data connection for your laptop with your cell phone when they can force you to buy one of their neatly packaged data plans.

And what really get’s my goat is that MMS and SMS for AT&T costs them nothing. To my knowledge, there are two different types of signals that are used for cell phones. The signal from the tower to your phone, and the signal from the satellite to the tower. The signal from the tower to your phone is used for data, phone calling, etc etc etc. It does cost AT&T money, but not much. The signal from the satellite to the tower is a large wave that if not used, just goes to waste. AT&T pays for a certain amount of this signal, and it’s more than enough to handle the transfer from the tower to satellite and so forth, and the calls and cell charges we are getting more than cover the cost of it. But the signal just goes to waste.

So what does AT&T do? They decide to use the wasted part of the signal for, you guessed it, Messaging packets. So when you send a text message or a picture message, it costs AT&T absolutely nothing. It’s free to them, that signal has already been bought and paid for. Whatever isn’t used is wasted, and there is more than enough to go around. So that $20 a month you paid for texting unlimited with your iPhone, yeah 100% of that is profit for AT&T. And they can’t find it in their hearts to give us MMS and Tethering from the get go… Greedy fucking bastards.

But I can get you tethering, and maybe MMS.

Check your version of iTunes, should be 8.2.0.23. This is the latest version of iTunes, and it’s no good. Sync and backup your iPhone and uninstall iTunes. After you uninstall itunes, go into your My Music Folder or wherever your itunes library is located and rename the itunes folder to itunesold or something like that.

Go to the internets, find itunes versuin 8.2.0.10. It came out in May, I was able to find it on a torrent site, be careful. Download and install.

Go here and save the ATT_US.ipcc file to your desktop.

Plug your iPhone into laptop, select it in itunes, then hold the shift button down, and hit update. Change the file type to ipcc and find the file you downloaded in the previous step. Your iphone my freeze, do some funky stuff. Give it a minute or two. After it looks like its ok, turn off your iphone and turn it back on.

Go to settings, General settings, Network, and you should have tethering. You’ll want to uninstall the old version of itunes, delete the itunes folder it created, rename the one you previous called old to itunes again and reinstall the itunes you had before.

Now for MMS… I was able to get tethering, but MMS, not so much. Rumor has it that if you pull your sim from another phone that isn’t an iPhone, put your iPhone sim in that phone, make a few calls check your voicemail, do this for like 30 minutes or until you see that the att website has picked up your new phone. From here, on the web go and change your messaging settings to one that includes MMS. Go through the legal BS, click ok etc. After you do that, swap the SIMs, turn on your iPhone and you should have MMS. I tried, it didn’t work, but im impatient. You may have better luck.

Now to call AT&T for the fifth time today and bitch that I’m not eligible for the $199 16GB 3Gs.

One thing that has always bugged me is people who lack common sense. Certain thoughts, ideals, and actions shouldn’t have to be thought about or even debated, some things just make sense… Or so they are supposed to just make sense.

Proposition 8 in California banning gay marriage is absolutely absurd and I’m embarrassed that it is even a question whether or not two people of the same sex should be able to marry… OF COURSE THEY SHOULD!

Now I’m not gay, I’m the furthest thing from gay. The idea of another man naked or anything like that kind of freaks me out a little bit. I wouldn’t mind two women together, that’s absolutely fine with me. Maybe I’m a little close minded to it, but really my position on gay men has no effect on my position on gay marriage.

Opponents to gay marriage charge that a marital union should be between a man and a woman. Really? where does it say that? Oh it says it in the bible? Ok… that’s fine. If you want to live by a book that was written in different parts between about 2000 and 4000 years ago, ok that makes sense, because things haven’t changed since then?

Let me also bring to your attention that the bible also regularly makes points that women are inferior to men, for example: Genesis 3:16, Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

Also, take note of, 1 Corinthians 14:34-36, Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.

So you want to base your life and your ideals of marriage off of a book which basically states women are to serve their man and that women are not allowed to speak in church. Sounds fair to me right? I can understand living your life by the word of Christ, sure that’s fine with me to live by the ten commandments and to be all without sin and everything. And I’m fine in you believing in a God and that he sees all and that his son died some 2000 plus years ago for your sins, then rose 3 days later etc etc etc. Yeah, I’ll let you get away with that, I think we all need to believe in some sort of higher power, and for some if that’s all you can do to get through the day, so be it. And sure you might fight the above two quotes with some of your own, but really do you want to argue that you are following a book that so clearly has conflicting view points?

But don’t let an archaic book rule your life, it’s asinine. Gay marriage should be legal, and all you bible thumpers need to remember something here. God’s law may call for a marriage between a man and a woman, and you can believe that all you want. So two men can’t get married at a church with a priest and be married according to the bible and church and everything. You can have that, I won’t fight you there. But to say that two men can’t get married by the law according to the United States of America is completely contradictory to everything the US of A stands for.

When it doesn’t appease us it is so easy to forget the constitution and the bill of rights, but it’s absolutely apparent here that we are reminded that Amendment #1 of the constitution clearly states, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;” Do you understand what that means? It means that no law can be passed that would respect in any sort of way the laws of any sort of religion, that we can choose whatever religion we wish to follow. So if my big gay god wants to allow some homosexuals to get married so be it, I don’t have to give a crap what your God thinks. We must also remember that when a state joins the USA, that state agrees to not pass any laws which conflict with the constitution and all of it’s amendments.

So a law banning Gay marriage, in respect to the christian church that claims that marriage should be between a man and a woman is unconstitutional. Now I know all you right wing religious nuts are ok with bending the laws of our constitution just like your favorite son George W. Bush was. But people who actually respect the highest laws of our country and who actually live by them, see their value, and respect their meaning, and are ok with gay marriage.

And what really contradicts everything is that those same right wing fanatics, who oppose gay marriage and who will oppose this blog entry, which is also protected by amendment #1, are the ones who vehemently stand by amendment #2 the right to bear arms.

I’m sorry folks, you can’t pick and choose the amendments of the constitution that you want to follow, this is not an a la carte of laws. You either follow them all or you move to Canada, where gays can get married, at least they have it correct up there.

So California, you got it wrong. Gay marriage is fine, it hurts no one. Equal protection by law, for all. As we approach the July 4th holiday in just over a month, and we celebrate the Signing of the Declaration of Independence, we should live by it’s most ominous verbiage, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” Yes, that includes the Gays.

One of the most deplorable things in the world is sport or match fixing. The spirit of competition and the veritas of the final outcome is what makes sports so entertaining. It’s why referee’s are at all professional sporting events, it’s why instant reply and rule changes are being implemented by competition committees in order for fairness to prevail.

Fixing games has gone on for what seems as forever. And it is not just the individual outcome of games that are being affected. The NBA and NHL both had to implement lottery rules in order to prevent the fixing of entire seasons in order to procure higher draft picks.

Unfortunately fixing isn’t something that began with modern sports, in fact fixing goes back to the ancient Olympiads, and gambling actually goes back to before recorded history. You don’t think the snake bet Adam that Eve would eat the apple?

Fixing was common in ancient chariot races where riders were paid to lose, boxing was seen as a common sport to fix, with fighters literally, “taking a dive.” It is much easier to fix a sport when it’s only individuals participating. Sport fixing and gambling really came to the front of the public eye in 1919 with the black sox scandal. Eight White Sox members were allegedly paid to throw the world series. None of these players ever admitted to fixing the games, however they were banished from baseball.

For these reasons, players, coaches, trainers, etc are not allowed to bet on sports they participate in. It seems common sense, and as the Pete Rose saga has shown us, baseball is taking this seriously. Not until 2006 with the whole Tim Donaghy scandal has it really seemed an issue with referees helping to influence the outcome of games. Tim has admitted to fixing at least 10-15 NBA games which he bet on.

From fixing chariot racing, to teams throwing games, to referees gambling and influencing the outcome of games, we also see fixing in Olympics and tennis. And it is not always the Mafia that is fixing games.

Fixing games bothers me, but what is really getting my goat is the blatant disregard and public display of the latest fixings. If you watch sports I’m sure you see the Buffalo Wild Wings commercials.

A group of people are watching a sports game, and they want it to go into overtime so they can stay at the bar? I’m sure you’ve seen it. The first commercial they show looks to be an NFL football game between the Falcons and the Vikings. I only say this because of the uniforms that are being worn in the game and the jersey that is being worn by the fan who speaks up. Here is the commercial, thanks to youtube.

Now what seems funny that they use this game is because the 1999 NFC Championship between the 16-1 Minnesota Vikings, who were HEAVILY favored and the Atlanta Falcons at 15-2 went into overtime. In fact, the Vikings ended up being the first team to finish the regular season 15-1 and NOT make it to the superbowl. The Falcons winning this game caused Vegas to win a lot of money. What is interesting is that BWW implicates that they push the game into overtime so that fans don’t have to leave the restaurant. Is that really fair? You fix a game so you can have a few more Budweiser and another dozen wings? What’s even more egregious is that the referees were involved. What gets my blood boiling is that instant replay was not re-instituted officially until the 1999 season, and I wonder why this playoff game was chosen as a guinea pig…

There is a new BWW commercial out there where a fan wants the game to go into overtime so he has the bartender flip up a special compartment and choose the New York/Boston Basketball game. This alerts a photographer who starts blinding the players and mascots to force the game to overtime. I checked the history and in 2005 in Larry Brown’s first game as Knicks head coach, the Celtics beat the Knicks 114 – 100 in overtime. Larry Brown is a famous coach, he is in fact the only coach to have won championships in the NCAA, ABA and NBA. His arrival in New York was considered huge in that it would turn the Knicks around to the glory days. His first loss to the lowly 2005 Celtics seem to knock the ship off course and it never recovered. I couldn’t find video of this commercial, possibly I didn’t look hard enough. Or maybe it was pulled because of my investigation.

What is BWW going to do about this? How would they answer to these allegations? And why are they displaying this blatant cheating on television for millions to see? I contacted BWW this morning via phone and received no comment. I highly doubt that has to do with me calling before they opened. The message I didn’t leave was also not returned. So why the silence? why the secrecy? I didn’t call the NFL or the NBA and also received no comment from them.

The sports world is not up in arms about this and I can’t figure out why. Here is a friggen bar bragging about fixing games and you stand with your hands tied. Does BWW know something about the NFL and NBA that they don’t want anyone else knowing?

Possibly some high up officials were drinking at BWW when the Boss Alarm commercial was filmed?

How deep is the infiltration, they have a random photographer at a Knicks game in 2005 with a beeper and an extra bright flash bulb? Is BWW behind all the fixings around the world? Maybe the 6 OT game in the Big East tournament was set up by BWW. It took 6 Overtimes for Syracuse to get Hasheem Thabeet to foul out, could this possibly be the mastermind of BWW at work? Only time will tell, I will continue to investigate until I find the truth.

So I put it out there, I exposed the NBA, NFL and Buffalo Wild Wings… The fix is in, I’m blowing the whistle.

I really didn’t want to have a toilet humor Volume one post, let alone a second one, but somehow I was inspired again by bowel movements.

Last night my girl friend and I had dinner out at Applebees which was delicious as always, but for some reason whenever I eat there I have to go as soon as we leave. Some how on the way home it came about that I should get out of the car and poop on the sidewalk right outside of the mall, then my imagination went wild, here is what transpired.

GF: ” You should poop on the sidewalk.”

Me: “Yeah that’s a good idea.”

GF:”You should do it, I’ll pull over.”

Me:”I really don’t need to get arrested right now.”

GF:”Or at all.”

Me:”Well right now in particular because I have too poop. I’d end up going in the back of a cop car…I’d be the lead story on the 6 o’clock and 11 o’clock news… Or one of those special pieces at the end of the newscast. ‘Man has crappy day. Local man Matt Groff was arrested this evening, get this, for deficating on the sidewalk. Can you believe that Jim? No I can’t Sally. But that’s not all, as he was being put into cuffs and in back of the police cruiser, Mr. Groff just couldn’t hold it anymore, he also deficated there… Oh my, that’s digusting. Well now Mr. Groff won’t have to walk very far to the can in his Berks County Prison cell, he’s being charge with disorderly conduct, indecent exposure and destruction of public property. Boy what a crappy day, now here is Tom with the weather.’ “

You know those warning signs and labels on cleaning products and medication, like. “Do not take more than recommended dose.” “Do not get hair dryer wet.” “Do not put Baby or Kittens in Microwave.” Signs like that, which, don’t seem to be too necessary considering it’s common damn sense that you do not put a kitten or a baby in the microwave, at least I think it is. But these signs and warnings are made because at some point in time, someone attempted to do one of these things.

But that’s not the kicker, that isn’t the worst sign that I think you see. That is below.