I’m a fan of live music, I like going to concerts, shows etc. So when I was presented with the opportunity to see a friends band at a local club, I jumped at the chance. ‘Drop of Grey’ played its first show in a year on Friday at the chameleon club. The show was great, the band sounds like they haven’t missed a beat, but that’s not what I’m here to write about.
I hadn’t been to the Chameleon club in years. I actually can’t remember the last time I was there to be honest. My friends and I used to go all the time for 18+ nights and concerts and shows, it was the thing to do because you got drunk, and you got some live music. I remember specifically starting a tab, getting a few rounds of drinks, having a good time. I don’t remember some asshole owning the club however.
Last night my friends and I had to scrape together cash in order to get into the parking garage across the street from the club. I don’t carry cash, it’s not my style. I have a check card that runs directly to my bank account and I use that wherever I go. If I’m going somewhere that I’ll need cash like a casino, or a strip club, I’ll get cash before I go. But a bar that routinely has bands and shows and people, that’s been around forever and has recently renovated, I don’t take cash for that. It seems like the kind of place that would allow you to start a tab.
When we arrived on the second floor of the chameleon club, we saw everyone inside paying with cash for drinks, we thought this was odd. Asking the bartender we discovered we couldn’t start a tab. I had noticed an ATM machine on the first floor when we entered so I ran downstairs and went to swipe my card… Out of order. I went to go back upstairs and asked the bouncer what I could do, he mentioned that another ATM machine was on the second floor by the ladies room.
Walking back up the stairs and back the hallway to the ladies room, I went to swipe my card again, only to find… Out of Order. Ok, this sucks. Am I going to have to leave to get cash? What the hell kind of bar doesn’t let you run a tab? Isn’t that better for business when I can put some plastic down and let it ride?
We asked the bouncer again what we could do, he said, “Oh both of them are out, well talk to the owner he can get them refilled.” At this juncture he points to a 5′6″ dorky looking guy who resembles Dean Pritchard from “Old School.”
I walk over to the bar and track down the owner, here is what transpired:
Me: “Excuse me.”
Owner: “Yes?”
Me: “Hi, sorry, both of your ATM machines are out of order?”
Owner:”They are out of cash?”
Me: “Yeah.”
Owner: “Ok, well. just wait 10 minutes and they will get filled.”
Me:” Thanks, I don’t carry cash.”
Owner:”Oh that wasn’t very smart.”
Then he chuckled and walked away.
I can take this one of two ways, I can shut my trap and wait 10 minutes to get a drink, because I haven’t seen my friends band yet and I’d like to not get thrown out before they go on; or I can tell the Dean how I really feel. I chose option one, however; this is what was going through my mind.
Look here you slimy little prick, I don’t carry cash because it’s fuckin’ 2010 and the majority of businesses allow you to run a card for a tab. Little did I know that some asshole who think’s he is better than filling up his ATM machines before a God Damn show owns this place and would have some snide remark about me not carrying cash. I never carry cash, it’s petty to carry cash. I don’t know many people who DO carry cash simply because that shit is the nastiest germ ridden crap on the planet. It has even more bacteria on it than your damn uncleaned toilets.
So next time I come to your club, if I ever do decide to come to your club, if you still are in 1972 and won’t allow me to run a tab, and it just so happens that BOTH of your ATM machines are out of money, if I ask you to fill them nicely like I did, and if I tell you that, “I’m sorry, I don’t carry cash.” And you decide to get the balls to say to me “That’s not very smart.” I might let loose and call you a Prick, or an asshole, even if it gets me thrown out of your dingy little club.
It’s also not very smart to offend your customers so they never want to set foot in that dump establishment every again. I brought five total people to your club, we each spent $6 on tickets, as well as about $100 on drinks and tips. That’s $130 you may be alienating every time you open your smelly little mouth dickhead.
Eat shit!
